don't bother. she don't live here anymore.

2007-01-21T01:12:00.000-08:00

Au revoirThis online diary has ,albeit cryptically, documented the days when I was a young foolish little thing, with the very url of that being evidence. So, perhaps, and although I'm relatively young and technically still foolish and what not, just perhaps, I'm picking up my bags and leaving.

2007-01-17T01:22:00.000-08:00

the days of my much-cherished youth has come and gone, and i sit here alone staring at the blank blank walls. because in my room many have come and gone, none has stayed;the characters in this play has constantly changed. am i be in constant pursuit of what has come to past?or do i have to chase after the present you? so awkward is the words we sayand the things we do; we force ourselves back

2007-01-16T01:41:00.000-08:00

I re-committed my life to Him again, and my life is in His hands, from now and forever. It is by His grace and strength that I'd last through this grueling semester. Amen.

2007-01-06T19:28:00.000-08:00

A dig into the blog archive retrieved this. Tribute to TMT 2003. (posted on 01/10/2004)do you rememberwhen we played silly games at the back of the song tiao?when i drank close to 5 pints of water cause i was a lousy player? when we played bridge and tai dee every night? when i finally mastered the opening lines to qing tian on the guitar in 10days? when we danced our hearts out to 'worthy'? when

2007-01-04T00:19:00.002-08:00

TMT 2006 : 18th Dec - 27th Dec The entire trip wasnt a blast like how TMT 2005 was, where we were all high and tripping, going from one energy high to another. It didnt have its signature poignant moments, where I would clearly take my jaunt down the memory lane and sigh how TMT 2006 was. In a rather different approach, this time around, maybe I can rejoice in the fact that I took the effort to

2007-01-03T01:40:00.000-08:00

Psalm 27: 1-3The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom should I fear?The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid? When evil men advance against me to devour my flesh, when my enemies and my foes attack me, they will stumble and fall. Though an army beseige me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident. --I spent the first day

2006-12-11T23:50:00.000-08:00

If its not a Youtube video, it would be dripping with Emo wetness. This is officially one of the sweetest songs I've heard, but the chords are way killer. http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/tabs/j/jack_johnson/better_together_ver4_tab.htmLearn it and I'll swoon for you! (and Eunice will fight me for you! Wth!!) HAHAHHAXOXO

2006-12-11T12:44:00.000-08:00

29/12/2005: MEMOIRS OF TMT2005 PART 2 - I wish you a merry Christmas (Thai version) A belateddddddd..Khor hai mi khwam suk wan clismassKhor hai mi khawm suk wan clismassKhor hai mi khawm suk wan clismassLat sawatdee bi mai!!!!!my face is rearranged into a cornucupia of dullness and disbelief cause i took 710 PICTURES AND VIDEOS.goodness gracioussssss!i think its unnecessary for me to say im back

2006-12-11T03:21:00.000-08:00

its repulsive to hear you go through the same convo over and over again dissing peopledressing in such a gros(pronouced ie, gross weight, as a nod to old pple) wayfeeling stupidfeeling lousyfeeling ugly (because you are ugly, fact)dissing people inwardlybeing a humongous big fat ugly lousy stupid brainless etiquetteless lifeless boring nobody. i hate it when you do it because you are repulsive by

2006-12-06T02:31:00.000-08:00

Perhaps I wasnt meant for this place. Not perhaps. I am not meant for this place. This place is an in-between site for me, I should have reached where I am supposed to 5 years ago. Overlooking the first few toddler years I've had, the rest I grew up as an alien. Riduculous. I am going to carry on my journey to where I am supposed to be. Someone, kill me. Literally.

2006-12-05T01:12:00.000-08:00

Memoirs of TMT2005Oh La Nor.. My LoveBy Bird Thongchai! YAY! THOUGHT I'D NEVER HEAR THIS AGAINNNNNNN <3<3<3<3

2006-11-26T02:49:00.000-08:00

I CANT HELP IT!!! ALL OF TODAY I WAS IRRITABLE AND ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING EXASPERATED ME BUT THIS!!!! THIS!!!!!!!THIS!!!"Wars of In-laws" (hey dont blame me for the bad english, its a HK serial!) I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!i want a Mau Chun!

2006-11-25T00:07:00.000-08:00

I just couldnt help it! Britney's making a comeback! (Although this is an older Pepsi commercial she did, its good!)

2006-11-23T00:59:00.000-08:00

Justin Timberlake's "My Love"He did nothing for me in his boyband and crymeariver days, but this one is truly incredible. Fusing R&B with a soulful trance, JT's hit the nail on its groovy head. And if you thought MJ circa 1990s was slick, boy genius JT will show you what slick really is.

2006-11-18T00:56:00.000-08:00

i was admitted in SGH on wednesday night and just got discharged today. i dont have enough time to study for my 3 consecutive papers come mon tues and wedi cant fail. im really really afraid of failing:"""""'(

2006-11-17T20:31:00.000-08:00

Because we are all welcome into the Promise Land.

2006-11-09T01:44:00.000-08:00

Free -HillsongWould you believe me if I saidThat we are the ones who can make the changeIn the world today?Would you believe me if I saidThat all of the dreams in your heartCan come true, today?Would you believe me if I saidThat life could be all that you want it to be, today?And if I had wings I would fly'Cause all that I need You areAnd if the world caved in around meTo You i'd still hold

2006-11-05T01:47:00.000-08:00

I've been on a major trip down my dorky memory lane. And Youtube has been the perfect darling guide all the way. So here they go!You just got to love the old school!!!!! ;)Spice Girls - Too MuchSpice Girls - GoodbyeMel C (of the Spice Girls) - Things will never be the same againBackstreet Boys - Backstreet's backBackstreet Boys - The callBritney Spears - Hit me baby one more timeBritney Spears -

2006-10-31T08:07:00.000-08:00

MARYKATE! <3<3<3 IM MK'S FANGIRL! YAY!

2006-10-28T00:45:00.000-07:00

Is opinion fact?Rephrasing it, it would read as is any one of my opinion a fact?Snort. Any loud-mouthed idiot (aka me) can easily tell you no. What i think definately isnt true, well, at least sometimes only. Haha. So when I say i think that something's up, it doesnt exactly mean something's up. But you have to listen, you've got to listen to my opinion and THINK IT OVER AND THINK IT THROUGH.

2006-10-22T01:17:00.000-07:00

When i am upset, i store it. When i get pissed, I keep it in. So its all fine and dandy, eh?But one day, when i get enraged, Im going to make sure your face gets a slap like no other, to get yr stinking hell attitude proper. You'd better keep it in check. So, how does it feel to read a post like this about yourself? Oh pray, do tell.

2006-10-19T02:41:00.000-07:00

Film Festival Trailer (Strong Machine 2)<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3SHE'S ONLY 11!!!! MORE, MORE!!POLYSICS "Now is the Time"wicked goodness. <3!!YEAHYEAH so who cares if i have a test in 6 hrs; i finally can breathe!! :D

2006-10-14T03:43:00.000-07:00

i sat in the front with my mouth gummed close with fatigue and apprehension. usually, or at least in this particular situation, before, i would have shot my mouth off at everything and enjoy debating over serious issues like who's mahjong skills are better and kenny's singing ability. was it Me to be the wallflower in the conversation, or was it me, just being merely me?question is, how do we

2006-10-12T12:31:00.000-07:00

I am one of the most boring persons alive with the most mundane lifes in the universe. Seriously. -----I am going to ignore you, in the event i actually see you. If i can.

2006-10-12T10:58:00.000-07:00

i dont like my face, because i am ugly. i say this not out of selfpity and attention deficitness, but cause i hate the realisation of it. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH0153HRS12th October 2006.

2006-10-08T08:35:00.001-07:00

TO MY HCi dont know what your thinking. and i dont know what yr making me think. you make me think too much. all this when we're not even communicating. and when we do, its painfully awkward. le sigh. Charissa. Sunday, 07102006 2332Hrs

2006-10-07T11:24:00.000-07:00

On Friday, after i forced mother to go grocery shopping with me out of sheer boredom, we spied chess mooncakes as we were struggling our way home(with the multitudes of groceries of course).Honestly i had no recollection of what prompted me to tell mother "Haha, if only Gonggong were here now, he'd love them man!" She agreed with a rather wistful smile as I felt a slight pang in my heart.I want

2006-10-07T04:09:00.000-07:00

Gastric incident number 2 occurred, not that many knew about gastric incident 1. but i just thought i would blog it so that i would recall having such an eventful teenhood. The fateful day had to be a monday, of all days -2nd October 2006. Gastric Incident 2 (henceforth known an GI2) kicked off with me having sharp pains in my upper abdomen from 4pm, through lessons and all the way through

2006-10-01T02:51:00.000-07:00

personality traits that MAKE ME WANT TO SLAP SOMEBODY(S) STUPIDITY!!!!ARGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! seriously?! seriously seriously seriously? this is a situation that involves you forking over almsot a thousand bucks and you dont even bother to read instructions, rules and regulations and emails?! seriously. do your homework, ask around to get some knowledge and QUIT SMS-ING ME TO DOUBLE CONFIRM

2006-09-25T11:04:00.000-07:00

oh dear, oh dear. how come when i get a whole week off i have tons to do?:[ now that monday's over, i now dread the remaining days. esp thursday. theres nothing quite like a tall menacing-looking man glaring down and sighing with his giant nostrils every 15 mins, then shouting heartlessly at you without mercy. :[:[:[ ive been scared pissedlessly twice everyweek that my nails are bitten ragged.psk

2006-09-19T04:29:00.000-07:00

Dear God, keep Thong Dee save in yr arms, Lord. you know how he has served you time and time again every mission trip, and you know his heart, Lord. guide him every single day, such that he will be aware of Your prescence, and realise that You love him in a way no one else can. keep his family safe and out of harm's way, and keep them in the pink of health. and Lord, may yr love and wisdom shine

2006-09-17T23:16:00.000-07:00

school drains me more than i realise.and i realise i covert him more than i think.le sigh.--should i skip the heaviest days of school to run off to the land of happiness for a 4 day trip?oh, i dont know.

2006-09-04T01:32:00.000-07:00

I AM GOING TO FAIL.LIKE EVERYONE HAS PREDICTED AND ASSUMED MY CAPABILITES TO BE THE BARE MINIMUM, I WILL FAILI WILL FAIL ALL MY THREE PROJS AND SPEECH AND I WILL FAIL AND FAIL SCHOOL AND QUIT SCHOOL AND RUN AWAY.RUN AWAY.God please i need your strength, please.

2006-08-18T22:58:00.000-07:00

Last life in the Universe. <3

2006-08-14T01:19:00.000-07:00

so hiding behind a comp and being on YOHOHOPIRATES means that i dont have to interact/chitchat/be social.so yay for yohoho, then.----seeing that im actually jealous of people i dont know directly shows that i still do care.seriously?!sigh; @#$%^&(*&^%$#

2006-08-06T16:39:00.000-07:00

ive been really really angry over several things, and bottling them all up has really made me an emotional wreck. right now, going over the incidents in slowmotionrepeatmode in my mind has really cracked the bottle, and im going force myself out of this state.kheng/therest: i know you guys think that im merely being emotional and seirously just being drama, as usual. i clearly remember the line

2006-08-05T03:27:00.000-07:00

this time around, after calling the mother on the cell and whinining and sobbing bout this incident to her LIKE A TOTAL BABY,sigh; i am at a total loss on who to contact and curse to.cause i dont know who a friend is anymore.cause this time round,money >>>>> me.

2006-08-01T13:55:00.000-07:00

2006-07-31T18:36:00.000-07:00

ARRR!!!!!! BILLIONS OF BLISTERING BARNACLES!this is just a simple and ridiculous post to showHOW ADDICTED TO PUZZLEPIRATES I AM, SEEING THAT ITS PAST 6 AM, and to think i started at 2 am.Ahoy, thanks loads, GLENDA matey, seriously <3<3now i need to force myself to get some shuteye before the sun rises!! :S:S:S:S

2006-07-27T17:35:00.000-07:00

so when one agrees quite begrudgingly to leave her comfort zone for 5 days straight, one obviously hopes everything would be fine and dandy.the people you meet are nice; but thats what one only thinks.BUTwhen the seniors who surround you pass unflattering comments in hushed tones on the one (out of two) person who is your supposed guardian for the entire stay, what are you to do?when the people

2006-07-20T00:24:00.000-07:00

as the consequential actions and comments that serve as reminders and remains of the 5dayactionanddramafilled camp constantly bombard almost every moment i have, i am filled with dread at the very thought of even starting school.because like the stench of death, rumours and gossip stick to your silhouette and hound you till they either tear you down, or you create new ones to put the old ones to

2006-07-17T01:09:00.000-07:00

i abhor the way i feel.and i detest the person i am.

2006-07-10T01:49:00.000-07:00

im panicking in such a way that my mouth hasnt closed and my teeth has remained clenched for the better half of an hour.i think ill just call in and tell them ive personal matters to attend to for FIVE days straight.;S

2006-06-26T01:10:00.000-07:00

oh i forgot to post this!today i brought ariel and ryan to use the ladies. and cause ryan wanted the door to be closed, i pulled it closed fromm the outside as much as possible, and assumed a pseudo nonchalant stance, ie leaning on the stall and pretending to know how to whistle. haha i did it on purpose cause i wanted no part in helping ryan pee!so they both exit after me helping to tighen

2006-06-25T23:48:00.000-07:00

really occasionally i'd get this really strong and persistant urge to click on yr nick and demand rudely(as i always do) a reason as to why you never ever wished me a happy birthday but my heart pounds with fear at being ignored so the deed remains yet to be done.ok so i know i kept harping over birthday stuff though its way over but a girl has her issues ok!

2006-06-25T21:56:00.000-07:00

like many other days today is one of those where i feel really empty inside.nothing really interests me anymore.

2006-06-24T01:52:00.000-07:00

the bad part about birthdays (which is what birthdays are all about anyways - BAD PARTS)is that it becomes glaringly obvious how much people care bout you in the first place. because when the people whom you wish and pray and hope and yearn that the least they would do is text you a birthday msg are actually the last ones on earth who would bother. because like you suspected from the very

2006-06-13T04:58:00.000-07:00

i dont know how to tell you this exactly,but i miss you very very much.you wouldnt guess so, but i wouldnt tell or let you know either.cause you dont care, and you've gotten perfect replacements already.like i never existed.

2006-06-07T03:29:00.000-07:00

im importing my jay chou songs and warbling along to themand suddenly i really want to be 16 again,squat in the corner in the classroom and laugh for the entire recess till i pee bout chiasin's hilton photosit in my seat and endure the artic freezelaugh at mrs myrna koh ruffling her hair throughout the entire english lesson; WHAT?!!!cringe at mr siew tuck chun's white saliva spot and giggle at

2006-06-05T02:18:00.000-07:00

i just dont get it.when im fine and dandy the fridge is chocked full with cocacola and 7-up (benadryl and bricanyl) medicine.when im coughing like a hack and snotting all over the place they all disappear.DOES IT MAKE ANY SENSE TO YOU?!

2006-06-05T01:31:00.000-07:00

the thing is, i keep saying and repeating how i dont have any friends, when in actual fact, i do.the only problem is, i dont do anything to maintain the friendship.when im exhausted i cancel.when im sick i cancel.when i dislike the 3rd one i cancel.when im lazy i cancel.when im new(and afraid) of having new baby friendships i cancel.so maybe its not because i dont have any friends, it's more

2006-05-29T02:26:00.000-07:00

because im really really lazy to the extent that i dont even reply smses, this will suffice to jolt my memory when i read back in the future as an old forgetful lady with bad eyesight.i was pickpocketed of 400$S++ in Jatujat Salat, Bangkok. i played lan for the first time in thailand!! hahah it was amazingly hilarious cause i was totally and utterly new to it. but for anyone's information, i can

2006-05-25T01:29:00.000-07:00

im bawling like an idiot and thats reason enough for me to pack my bags and run away to thailand.

2006-05-25T00:14:00.000-07:00

the night before, i dreamt of you guys.in my dream i was alternating between laughs and giggles, and honestly had one of the best times in my life. i was on a estactic high; a feeling so rare. its a pity how the only time i really laughed like that and had so much fun it wasnt even real, cause in real life i would just be the wallflower that was being jibed at sometimes, or said odd things to

2006-05-17T00:56:00.000-07:00

PEANUT BUTTER SWIRLED BROWNIE omg omg omg omg omgi just baked one and INHALED ONE SLICE IN .4235423154SECONDS! it was AMAZINGLY MOIST AND FUDGY IN THE MIDDLEEEEEE!!!!!----i always end up making rash and impulsive decisions, and end up being really remorseful bout it. sigh.friends.sigh.

2006-05-12T22:48:00.000-07:00

well well, now my evilwishersyou can now throw yr head back and laugh heartily,cause my evil karma has returned to bite me back at my ugly ass

2006-05-08T23:58:00.000-07:00

to you of twelve years,the family was visibly and distinctly appalled at the very thought of your good idea, cause it would be abandoning me to fend my own way there. in a foreign land. at first i was majorly irked when the mother kept initiating the possiblity of her tagging along to ensure my safety, and then it finally hit me when even the younger sister was shocked, and for a lack of a better

2006-05-08T02:46:00.000-07:00

seriously, (aside from MANDA and HILARY due to the close proximity of their own ones),who on earth remembers my birthday?much less celebrates it?oh sod it.

2006-05-03T02:22:00.000-07:00

i have blueglitter fingernails!can someone say yay?i have no idea how much longer i can carry on pretending that its ok to be me.

2006-05-01T01:53:00.000-07:00

at the high risk of sounding cliche, it struck me that for the longest time ever i havent laughed till i gasp for air.and i miss that, like a caged rabbit missing fresh carrots. i wonder what i lack right now that has stolen away me, and put this cynical pessimist on relief duty.every single day i struggle with my own demons; i dont need anyone sending me on a guilt trip when im having a

2006-04-26T03:37:00.000-07:00

i realised that online shopping is really, really extremely addictive!!! but i honestly cant help but sit in front of the various amazing sites with my eyebaggage and sore butt and surf surf shop!!oh my.thats it. ive planned my future in 5 mins.i amgoing to move to NY and work in a MJ store!!!!!YAY!now for the funding and approval for my plans.

2006-04-26T00:45:00.000-07:00

MAJOR SOS!!!!total dilema.should i go for these?they are BEYONG GORGEOUS!! and after shipping and all it would be bout S$150!quick quick! it ends in roughly 8 hours, so anyone out there, anony as you can be, COMMENT AND TALK ME INTO/OUT OF IT!EDIT: dont you dare bid on it!! im going nuts on whether to bid on it or not!

2006-04-25T02:42:00.000-07:00

MAC inventory updateDUO adhesiveslicked pink lip geleedewy jube lip gelee#6s's!beelicious eyeliner!sigh. i thought i had it under control! but my purchase, i suppose is perfectly justified cause i lost my mercuric eyeliner! :( hehehe but i am considering buying one more item! wheeeeeeeI HATE THE FACT THAT I CANT STOP SNACKING. for fuck's sake! morsel by morsel i convince myself it wouldnt make

2006-04-18T18:57:00.000-07:00

= <3somebody, buy these for me!

2006-04-16T01:55:00.000-07:00

thursday night was good.i heart pretty hp charms!-----three outs, score!!!game over.GOODBYE. ill only have myself to blame for im EMO.

2006-04-08T00:31:00.000-07:00

friendships are so overated.at the rate im going, i dont think im gonna have/want much.

2006-03-26T01:53:00.000-08:00

i present to you,THE MAN IM GONNA MARRY!!!<3<3<3!!!!

2006-03-23T00:56:00.000-08:00

go stand outsideOUT, now!you are now officially an outcast.ugh i cant even bear glancing my own blog at all nowadays cause its all selfpity, depression and nothing more, and god knows how much i loathe those.gag.

2006-03-08T00:51:00.000-08:00

today i spent a ridiculous amount of money on cosmetics alone (which i highly doubt that i would end up using like the last haul), and bought a measly top which i dont think id wear too.haha what the fuck right.today i walked across, like a FREAKING desert to get to some lame booths and lousy stuff. bah. total waste of time.tml im going to work and im forcing myself not to get my hopes high up

2006-03-03T23:31:00.000-08:00

im feeling terrible right nowit could be the fatigue after 3 days of zombie work, paranoia, or simply just reality slowly setting in.so tell mehow come she gets to rejoice to high heavens while i slink away with slumped shoulders?how come the friends are out romping around town without a single heads up from them?how come im left with no choice but to toil away miserably at seedy counters?so now

2006-03-02T01:22:00.000-08:00

i am going to start crying soon, causewho is going to get me my WHITE PATENT STAM BAG?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!!?sigh.

2006-02-28T00:47:00.000-08:00

i SWEAR IF I DONT EAT ENOUGH TO MAKE MYSELF BLOAT ENORMOUSLY WITH PURE INDULGENT SATISFACTION RIGHT NOW ill forever be amazed with myself for the show/lack of selfcontrol i possess.and ill hate myself if i fulfill the above wish and end up worshipping the porcelain goddess.yeah and i really helps seeing the fact i enjoy frequenting foodblogs >daily basis.fuck man.

2006-02-27T02:23:00.000-08:00

at the risk of sounding repulsively cliched, i am searching for myself; desparately waiting for self-actualisation to occur.as of now my mind is in a very material state of assessment, where i judge myself based on the statistical value of what i have/am.which is quite sad really, cause its really quite superficially despicable seeing the fact that ive actually been caught by the careless traps

2006-02-23T18:36:00.000-08:00

I JUST BAKED LEMON MUFFINS AND ATE 6 IN A ROWWWnot good, not good.but tasty!200g of flour100g of brownsugar + white sugar60g of salted butterzest of 1 lemonjuice of 1 lemon + enough milk = 120ml1 eggcombine all and bake at 200degreescelcius for about 11mins to get about 40 golden perfectly tasty ones, or 12 mins for 40 goldenbrown muffins with crisptops! adapted from nigella's how to be a

2006-02-22T03:56:00.000-08:00

ive jumped onto the bandwagonnnnnandvoila!http://kevan.org/johari?name=HAHArainbowandhttp://kevan.org/nohari?name=HAHArainbow:D yes i quite like the name HAHArainbow. now do me this favour pretty please!<3

2006-02-21T02:47:00.000-08:00

the bag thats been driving me NUTS!!!!just the other day a lady walked by with it hanging off her elbow and i uttered a freaking shellshocked 'OMG' cause i totally never expected it to appear anywhere in singapore!!!!!! that being said, i hope no taitais actually realise how utterly gorgeous and chic it is(like the one who was carrying it!!!!!!) and i get a slim chance from nowhere in purchasing

2006-02-17T23:52:00.000-08:00

I AM HAPPY LIKE A FREAKING HIPPO CAUSE IN FEBUARY ALONE IVE MANAGED TO AMASSmac eyeshadown in browndownmac lipstick in strawberry blondemac lipstick in freckletonemac LE thunder quadmac glitterliner in spunsilvermac glitterliner in saucepotmac glitterliner in mercuricmac glitter in redmac tinttoonsTLC in cleo's coral kissmac tinttoonsTLC in tempting tilliemac tinttoonsTLC in coquettish

2006-02-12T02:32:00.000-08:00

ive been avoiding a certain place cause for some reason for another the thought of returning there doesnt really send excited tingles up my spine. it might be a habit, routine or a must for others, but i suppose for me, it has graduated from a habit to something of my preferance.soemtimes when i enter that place, i feel terribly out of place. at other times, i feel myself getting really

2006-02-09T20:56:00.000-08:00

its the only first 9 days of Febuary and ive already spent43.50$: tempting tillie tlc + freckletone l/s (heheeheheheh 20% off :)13.50$: mac red glitter (HAH 50% offfffffffff :))))))))30$: glitterliner in spunsilver! (MAJOR WHEEE!!!!!!!!!!) 30$: mercuric g/lwhich boils down to 117$ on MAC ALONE. with a pending $80(if i get the discount!!!) for the icon thunder quad and strawberry blonde l/s! SIGH.

2006-02-04T00:56:00.000-08:00

i have no idea what ive gotten myself into.i feel like crying.I WANT A MJ PATENT STAM BAG IN IVORY OR BLACK!!!or my heart will bleed :'(

2006-02-01T19:28:00.000-08:00

ive stopped smiling and laughing unless i decide to patronise you.:[ im lost, confused and seemingly alone.

2006-01-28T20:30:00.000-08:00

nothing really beats yr own father telling you to your face that your face is horrible and people get frightened by it.plus the fact that every year all relatives agree distinctively in my face that the sibling is prettier.i have no idea what to think or where to look anymore.:',',(

2006-01-27T22:44:00.000-08:00

i present to you... 2Harmony!!! <3the two boys with the fingers on their heads, shijie and khatik, are little monsters i tell you!! every recess shijie comes to me with so-called his stomachache/hurtknee/cuts and ask to leave for home early, and khatik is always there to substantiate his cause! the little boy in red qipao behind shijie, is one of the most adorable boys ive ever seeen!! utterly

2006-01-21T16:33:00.000-08:00

say hi to the newest members!!! :))))) the older but relatively newer onestoo! heart! my photos dont do em justice cause well, it is HARD TO USE A DIGICAM WITHOUT A WORKING SCREEN!!!

2006-01-21T02:40:00.000-08:00

these few days have been rather hectic.wednesdayyyy i had3 interviewsone long walk in the heavy downpour in townthe amount of walking i did with really evil shoes(ZZ really bad. raffles city up and down to town's lido to winsland to paragon!)incidental shopping (HONESTLY! :))and hehehe a joboffer from the director of bikram yoga by total chance cause she offered me the shelter of an umbrella and

2006-01-17T01:58:00.000-08:00

i want balloons like these for my birthday.pretty please.

2006-01-16T22:12:00.000-08:00

at this very instant im experiencing a very overwhelming and suffocating sense of failure.i cant seem to find any proper job.im barely equipped with any skills.i dont keep my promises.the only seemingly redeeming attribute that i possess is that im excellent at wasting time.:'(((

2006-01-16T17:47:00.000-08:00

IM SICK SICK SICK.sniffling 24/7, sneezing my dust bunnies out, weak limbs and achnig body.boo.gee not fun at all.buy my cookies! bluetopazgurl@yahoo.com

2006-01-13T15:13:00.000-08:00

thank You for simple pleasures in life.because it is sunny today.as You'd promised.:)

2006-01-12T04:25:00.000-08:00

i want this pair of purrrttyy rainboots!Yellow Zelda John Lemon Rainboot in size 9too bad its all the way over in target us, where those mean pricks wont ship over to sg!:(((( anyone wanna buy it for me and ship it all the way here at your own cost? ;)

2006-01-08T22:47:00.000-08:00

wednesdayi went night cylcing after a row with the parental authority [stating reasons for me to gallivant around in the mid of the night on a bike!] from 1 till 4++ am, aftereating teochewbuiinhaling french fries at bm's macand speed cycling around gwc!fridayi went night cycling again!with weiwei kennyboy yz cm and we headed fromyz's torivervalley for prata [mmmmmhh! yummy eggpratas!] toall the

2006-01-04T18:15:00.000-08:00

i think im headed towards dumpsterland at 100km/min.because firstly, i havent bathed since monday night [HAHAH :)]ive been cooped up at home since thenall i do is eat rubbish like oranges, buttered toast, stealing dinner at 6pm, drinking gallons of too-sweet ribena, eating tons of hammered pork, msg-enhanced fattening japanese snacks and whatnot.everynight i sleep at 4/5am after scrolling through

2006-01-02T15:10:00.000-08:00

haha i know we've distanced seeing the fact that i dont call you anymore and vice versa, we dont arrange to go out at all, i didnt even bother to reply that msg and there's no mention of me on yr blog and same goes for mine.haha what to do. thats life. im not self-pitying myself on having this great friendship sorta chill to a large extent but more of a matter-of-fact that i felt like seeing on

2006-01-02T02:48:00.000-08:00

everyday i pour over almost every entry at the mac lj communityand on saturday i spent over over overrr a hundred sing buying 4 mac itemsbitter e/sflashtrack e/sblue asinthe e/snaked you msf [which imho is prettier than petticoat :)]and im still staring and drooling helplessly at the products.sigh.shot me please.hahahahahahahaha cause the mother has yet to know bout the purchase!and the many more

2006-01-01T21:58:00.000-08:00

i get all these thank-you notes and grateful msgs and i feel so repelled by myself.because ive cheated you all.i wasnt spiritually ready when i went on the trip and the main reason i went was because i felt obliged to.it wasnt because i felt the calling to, but because i was expected to.it worsened when i became the 2ic cause im a cheat.a repulsive fraud.when i get all this thankyous and

2005-12-31T02:47:00.000-08:00

on thursday i alternated between the two comps.on the comp with msn i hid myself on msn by appearing offline more than 3/4 of the day.tml i want to head out to town and go some major MAC damage to the nets but i dont know who to ask out.at this moment i dont want to have to chat continuously with my company or entertain the person throughout the shopping venture.sigh. i dont knowwwwwwwwwi think

2005-12-29T22:37:00.000-08:00

suddenly i feel quite ill about being home.for the entire day i felt dead bored but vehemently refused to head out.because for the entire day today i could have been teaching english, playing games and chatting with the thai kids in schools, helping out at the Homework club or having CS time or briefing at this very moment.and while doing so i would be taking digs at Nat, teasing Demi Moore and

2005-12-29T18:20:00.000-08:00

A belateddddddd..Khor hai mi khwam suk wan clismassKhor hai mi khawm suk wan clismassKhor hai mi khawm suk wan clismassLat sawatdee bi mai!!!!!my face is rearranged into a cornucupia of dullness and disbelief cause i took 710 PICTURES AND VIDEOS.goodness gracioussssss!i think its unnecessary for me to say im back. :)

2005-12-19T02:23:00.000-08:00

this is bad.at 0210 in the early morning my bag is barely packed, my room looks like the wardrobe and makeup stuff vomitted on it, and ive officially messed up the second comp area.not to mention how my bag is TOO TINY for everything i have and im mentally panicking cause the closet perfectionist in me is afraid i'd miss something from the checklist [ROAR] or leave my MAC out for the remaining

2005-12-17T23:21:00.000-08:00

question: how does one sob without alerting one's parents?question: how does one clear their own name while being maligned and keeping silent?question: how does one sort out their emotions so it is tidy and comprehendable like, oh i dont know, my panty drawer on a good day?question: how does one lead 14 pple when others and she herself doubts her very own abilities?question: why does it all